


Forever

by vagrantBreath



Series: Aether binds us [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Au Ra Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Miscarriage, Patch 5.0: Shadowbringers Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-08-19 15:26:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20212006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vagrantBreath/pseuds/vagrantBreath
Summary: The Warrior of Light has had some physical ailments after defeating Emet-Selch. When Alphinaud goes to tell her of the results, he learns of something he never expected.





	Forever

_ "I love, and yes, even yearn even for touch as a woman does."_

Alphinaud found himself wearily remembering the Warrior of Light's words as Alisaie burned holes in his head, the sheet covering both her and the Warrior of Light's nude bodies pulled to her chin as she hastily pulled her lips from her partner's mouth. "Have you forgotten how to knock?" his twin snapped as her partner sighed.

"Tis okay," the Warrior of Light murmured to Alisaie, "comes with being the Warrior of Light," before sitting up, the sheet slipping off her torso. Alphinaud suddenly found the ceiling very interesting. "Where am I needed?"

"The- the Crystal Exarch has requested your presence," he said, his voice catching awkwardly on the words, feeling the aetheric scar on his throat hurt. This was not a situation he figured he'd catch either of them in, much less both, together. "He said it was regarding a matter you had brought to him earlier."

A soft gasp met his ears, and he could hear Alisaie sit up at that. "So he has an answer. Do you truly wish to know?" he heard her ask her partner. 

"My Alisaie..." The sound of tears catching her breath made Alphinaud look at her again, fair glad how Alisaie held the Warrior of Light allowed for some modesty. "I would rather wish to lay in your arms than worry of what grows inside, and what it could mean for both worlds." 

What grows-! "The Light? Has it returned?"

The two women stared at him.

"Dearest Brother," Alisaie growled. "Even you know what can happen when a woman lays with a man." She looked back at the Warrior of Light. "Though, we also worry what the Light has done as well," she admitted. "My Amarant, I would-"

"I know." The Warrior of Light sighed, ignoring how Alphinaud jolted at hearing her true name, love wreathing the word. "I would too." 

"Forgive me," Alphinaud said, a hand going to his chin in thought. With child did explain how she had been acting, and her reaction to her favourite foods. However, who could the father be? While he could think back on how her and Alisaie's relationship had developed, he couldn't remember- "I was not aware you had been courting a suitor."

"There wasn't. A suitor." 

Alphinaud froze, then slowly lowered his hand. The Warrior of Light- Amarant's voice had been nothing like anything he had heard from her before. He wasn't sure exactly what it was other than pure pain.

"It was... a one time passing fancy. I hadn't anyone between my legs for too long and I... decided to take a certain person to bed. Though now, considering he was... certainly not Auri, I'm worried about..."

"The child," Alphinaud finished, numb. He hadn't taken her for passing fancies as such. She had always seemed so focused on saving the world. The mere idea of her taking someone to bed for only a night when the Light- "Wait! Are you telling me you were with child when-?!"

She nodded.

The Warrior of Light had been fighting Emet-Selch, _Hades _, while a fragile life grew within. "Didn't you consider in doing so you'd lose the child?"

Something passed in her gaze, a type of melancholy he wasn't sure of the source. "I had no choice," she told him, her voice muted.

Alphinaud grew silent as his twin kissed Amarant's temple, trying to soothe the visibly upset Au Ra. A terrible thought came to mind, of why she may have been so hesitant to speak of the father. "Were you...?" he started, the horror of the possibility filling him. "Was it...? Did he...?" 

"No." He didn't think he had heard such emotion in a single word before from her, though he could not tell where it was directed. "I took him to bed willingly."

It was at that time Alisaie yanked on the sheet again, as if remembering her state of undress in front of her twin. "We can talk later after we're dressed," she told him tartly.

"Indeed." Then, he paused. "Will you... bring the child to term?"

"That answer is more complicated than you can ever imagine." The Warrior of Light slid out of bed and Alphinaud turned away hurriedly. He could hear her getting dressed as she spoke. "Though I regret the coupling, what I hold inside is more precious than even its own life. What the child represents is... far more than you can ever imagine."

Alphinaud thought at that. Then, softly, "May I take a guess as to the father?"

When he turned after a long silence, he saw her frozen there, one arm outstretched in the middle of pulling her arm through, the rest of her shirt bunched awkwardly around her neck. Finally, she pulled the shirt down, closing her eyes. "I feel you know."

"Do the rest know?" 

She shook her head. "Only you, Alisaie, and G'raha."

Alphinaud wished to ask more, but the look on her face stopped him. Instead, he said, "If you need help, all you must do is ask." 

She smiled, the turn of lips brief and thankful. "I forget sometimes I am not alone in my battles. I am so used to being the only one who could change things that..." She pressed a hand to her chest. "I forget I am never alone again." With quick movements, she pulled on a pair of shorts. Alphinaud blinked, realizing she was not pulling on her mage robes or knight armour, but rather wore a very casual red shirt with black shorts. But the immediate danger had passed, and any sin eater attacks could easily be handled by the guards and Lyna. The Warrior of Darkness could relax.

"If I may..."

He didn't have to finish the awkward question. 

"I don't know except when we... I saw him as who he was, from the viewpoint of who I used to be." Amarant closed her eyes as Alisaie, who had been quietly getting dressed, took her hand. "But who he used to be is long dead, and who I killed was a hateful husk of a brilliant man." One hand pressed flat over her stomach. "And what I carry... may throw both worlds back into chaos."

  


* * *

  


"Amarant," Crystal Exarch said as they entered the Ocular, his voice warm. "Alisaie. Alphinaud. Welcome." 

Alphinaud watched, a little surprised, as Amarant walked forward, rubbing one horn on his cheek, both greeting him as if they were both Miqo'te as well as showing affection as an Au Ra. But as she did know his true name, perhaps there was more history between them then he realized. Or, perhaps, because of the nature of the child she held within, she was grabbing affection where she could.

The Crystal Exarch pressed his flesh and bone hand against her cheek as she pulled back. "I fear I may have nothing but bad news," he told her, his voice muted.

"What do you mean?" Alisaie asked, shifting her weight. 

He pulled back, addressing all three of them. "First, may I assume both of you know the identity of the father?" When they nodded, he continued. "The child is... strangely compatible, Chessamile has told me. Ryne also has told me your aether is not rejecting the child. However... the same is not true for the child." He looked at all three of them, red eyes filled with remorse. "I fear the Light has indeed influenced the child, and will not survive now that it no longer resides inside you. While your body is doing what it can to hold on, if you haven't already lost the child since the examinations, you will soon. I'm sorry, my friend."

Amarant pressed a hand to her stomach. "Excuse me," she whispered before she turned and left."

Alisaie made a movement to follow, but Alphinaud held a hand out, stopping her. "Let her mourn," he told her, voice quiet.

She grit her teeth, but nodded.

"There is much for her to mourn," the Exarch told them. "While you are here, Alphinaud, how are you doing?"

Alphinaud looked at Alisaie, taking in her confused expression, and sighed slightly. "Occasionally it hurts when she is near, but it seems it's when she is in a state of high emotion. Otherwise, the aetheric burn does not hurt," he told the Crystal Exarch.

"Brother, what are you talking about?"

"It is a very long story, but simply put I suffered a burn from a powerful being's aether and we're keeping an eye on it as it seems it's worse than I expected." 

Alisaie eyed him, frowning. "I see."

She was going to press the Exarch for answers. He knew it. So before she could, Alphinaud told her, "I promise I'll explain later." 

"I will hold you to that." Her head turned as she shifted her weight, obviously wishing to follow Amarant. "Excuse me."

Alphinaud didn't stop her this time.

  


* * *

  


When Alphinaud felt it was time, he went searching for her. He found Amarant overlooking the amaro keep. "Do you know I can still occasionally feel your aether?" she told him, not turning.

"Aye. As can I."

She fell silent. 

"Did you... love him?"

"I don't know."

Alphinaud came up beside her, looking out over the keep as well. After a moment, she took his hand, squeezing. He squeezed back. 

"Will you tell the others?"

She shook her head. "No. I visited Chessamile after we spoke. There is no need to... tell them of something that is no longer there."

He squeezed her hand again. 

After a bit, she let go. "Alisaie is most likely wondering where I am." She smiled at him, the turn of her lips not erasing the sorrow in her eyes.

"I'm sorry."

Her warm lips gently kissed his forehead. "Tis another to fight for," she told him. "For those I have lost. For those I can yet save." 

"Tis not a fight you have to fight alone."

"No. Not anymore." 

**Author's Note:**

> Is this just a therapy piece for me regarding my own life?
> 
> ... Maybe?


End file.
